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| This is the asian form of apple manzana. Does it make me beautiful? |
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Sakuria Dinner
This last week was one of the most emotional weeks for me. "I just have a lot of feelings!" So on Tuesday we had a Zone Conference that me and my apartment sang at. It was a lot of fun. We sang Homeward Bound and even made Evans Shimai cry! YES! Evans Shimai is the mission presidents wife and she is a musical genius. She said that she always cries when something is good and we did so good that we made her cry. Champions. Anyways at this Zone conference the themes we Faith and Obedience. Two of my weakest points, and most favorite subjects. We did some Mogi's (roleplays) and I was doing awful. I was saying really stupid things and I did not believe in myself at all. I doubted my abilities to speak Japanese and it showed. I was super angry with myself and everyone around me. They even put the Gaijin (people not born in Japan) in a spot where they have English translations for the new missionaries. So I was very alone. It was funny now that I look back on it. I probably looked like such a loser hahah. Oh! At this zone conference they do this thing called bean shower. Everyone in the zone buys candy/food/random stuff for the new missionaries and they all go in a circle and give you this stuff until you can't hold it. It was awesome. And naturally I have almost eaten all of my food in one day. Somehow this still did not make me happy and I was still angry the whole time. Then President Evans anounced that we are going to be doing a testimony meeting and that I am going to be the first one to bear my testimony. I was soooo mad. I got up there and right before I was about to say anything I realized how big of an idiot I was being. I was being so selfish and focusing all on myself. That is when I learned about getting over yourself. But getting over yourself does not happen all at once. I was still so sad and angry for the next two days. On Friday I finally decided to change my attitude. My companion even said this to me,"One of our investigators is so close to being baptized. He was supposed to be baptized this week and it is like you aren't even happy for him." (Maybe he didn't get baptized this week because I wasn't ready for him?) I finally decided to just get over myself and my problems because we all have them. Nobody is perfect (thank you Hannah Montana) so just get over yourself and help people. For my my japanese is a joke. Yesterday a member asked me where I am from but I thought she asked where my last name was from, so I sat there for a good minute not saying anything and then said "wakaranai" (I dont know) she was like you mean from utah? I said no. Then after a good 5 minute conversation of me trying to understand her I finally just said Utah. She laughed and walked away. I didn't figure out what she was asking until after we got into a members car to take us to the trainstation. It was so awkward. I always do that. I also told a guy that his dead grandma is walking around in his house still. (I was trying to teach eternal families.) Yeah Japanese is the greatest! But my attitude about it is what is making it fun. It is amazing how your attitude changes what happens around you. This does not mean that hard things still don't happen. I still am having the hardest time of my life, but I am having the funnest time of my life doing it.
Well that last email just decided to send itself... Anways this week was a lot of fun though too! Yesterday we had a dinner appointment with a member family. They are the Sakurai family. I had SO much fun. That had this awesome piano that they made me play (don't make me dance, don't make me sing SNL) and I even played a duet with the daughter. It was awesome! I would show you the video, but I cannot. I will show you in 2 years though! Basically this week was a lot of walking and me thinking to myself. I had to fight my thoughts and think really hard to make myself happy. But I did it! I also learned that Japanese people think that I am weird because I am not as weird as them yet. So basically when I come home from my mission I am going to be the biggest freak on the planet hahahah I am so excited. To sum up this week: be yourself, be weird, be happy, and "forever fan the flame of your faith, because all things are possible to them that believe"
(sorry this email kinda sucked and was really short. But be happy and excellent to each other!)
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